On Being Judgmental

 Rabbi Abba bar Yudan said: Everything that God disqualified in animals, He endorsed in people. For animals, He disqualified the blind or broken or maimed, but in man He endorsed the broken, downtrodden heart.  (Vayikra Rabba 7)  As it says in the Torah, “A broken and contrite heart God will not turn away.”

It is good to be judgmental.

For if we do not distinguish between that which is good and bad how would we ever achieve a just society?  We will allow veil to run rampant.  What parent would tell their child to absorb the body blows and verbal assaults of bullies?  In our adult lives too, it is important to keep away from people who are doing bad things.  Even more, when we see a wrong being committed, we should not “stand idly by your brother’s blood.” Lev 19:16 We have a sacred obligation to. Do everything you can to stop evil.  And how can you do that without being judgmental?

It is bad to be judgmental.  

Has it ever happened that you see someone and instantly have a disliking to them?  Perhaps they remind you of someone hurtful. Perhaps they have the kind of face Hollywood would use as a “bad guy.”  In those instances, we may have acted derisively towards someone who did not deserve to be treated that way.   There are probably other times when we misinterpreted someone’s actions as harmful and wrong.  

How do we discriminate between the times when we are called to be judgmental and when we become the evil that we perceive?

A person should be judged based on action alone, nothing else.  Any other kind of judgmentalism is a prejudice, whether it is based on nationality, religion, dress, political party, or any belief system to which we do not ascribe.  Richard Bach opined that we hate that which we do not understand.  Simply because it differs does not make it bad.  To the contrary, the difference should make it interesting, worthy of exploring not destroying.

I began this article with a midrashic quote about a broken person.  We are all in various stages of brokenness.  No person gets through life unscathed.  It is vital to remember that just as God values the broken soul so we must imitate the Divine by embracing that which looks different from us.  We are loved by God with all our inadequacies and foibles.  So is the person next to us in the theater or who just blew past us on the highway with the music so loud it made our car shudder.

In the same sourced midrash above, Rabbi Alexandri stated, “A regular person, if someone serves him with broken vessels, he is insulted. But with God- the vessels that serve him are broken as it says, “God is close to the broken hearted.”