Our lives consist of two courses of action; that of doing and that of enabling. Most of what we hear about today involves doing. Social scientists urge to make the most of our time, what they call making “quality time.”
Our acquaintances and colleagues push us to define our value through our work or salary. For example, when people ask, “What do you?” Isn’t it interesting we invariably respond with our job rather than say, “I am a good father” or “I am a devoted husband?” A person’s life is summed by what they believe is most important and, or, what they have accomplished.
Yet we are great enablers. Some of us are better enablers than others. An enabler is someone that makes something possible. An enabler is the husband who says to his wife, “You are the most wonderful person I have ever met.” Just imagine what she can do with those words. Suddenly she becomes aware of her deep love for her husband and the fact that she is bright and capable. She may turn to a husband and say how much he appreciates his romantic side. Just think what that will do for the relationship! We have both become enablers.
I do not know what the opposite of an enabler is. But there are more anti-enablers among us who wreak havoc. They deprive us wholeness and the potential of what we might become.
What are you?
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